Thursday, May 23, 2013

One Small Hope

It's hard to push down the rising feeling of joy I have right now. The last week or so has been alternately boring and scary as hell, but I've been so focused on the mission that maybe I haven't conveyed that as best I could. Really that isn't surprising since most of the fear comes in the form of the everyday stuff we're used to dealing with: zombies, enemies, being discovered. It also helps that we're in a hidden spot with relative comfort. We're too far away for the little generator that powers our cell transmitter to be noticed. 

But today is different. The twin feelings of unbridled hope mixing with the nightmare worry that we will somehow screw it all up have reached a powerful crescendo. This morning the UAS contact confirmed that at least as of two days ago, Patrick was alive. Taken as a high-value information resource. 

Which pretty much means that unless he talked at the onset, he has been tortured. 

I don't know what my expectations are in that area. We have a standing policy that anyone captured in exactly this situation is supposed to give up what they know. We've got enough military people in our ranks to understand that eventually everyone will talk no matter how much training they've had. Also that it's impossible to give that kind of resistance training to even a fraction of our citizens. A stark reminder that no matter how much fighting we see or survival we manage, we're not really soldiers. Not in the modern sense. 

I'm torn about it because if Pat really is still alive, I'm afraid his stubborn and honorable streak may have kept him quiet. I know him better than almost anyone and it's easy to imagine him making jokes in the face of pain, starvation, even amputation. The guy cut off his own hand, after all, and wrote a blog post about it that made me laugh out loud. 

For his sake I hope he gave up every shred of knowledge without a fight. The idea that the friend I mourned for is still alive is amazing. Knowing he might be living every moment in agony because of his own foolish pride hurts. Pat is deeply informed about the operations of Haven and the Union. He's aware of every shred of data we gathered from studying the undead. He has been here since the beginning.

There are few people better informed. Myself, Jess...


Goddammit. I just realized why Will and the council are so furious but wouldn't say it. They were afraid of the messages being intercepted, lest they give the UAS ideas. Have to admit, it seems obvious. Might as well say it here because I think everyone else probably figured it out by now. 

The people in this truck are all equal or greater sources of information than Patrick. Son of a bitch. 

1 comment:

  1. Before the Fall I was with a group in exactly he same posistion you're in right now. It sucks, but you'll make it through ok if you stay hidden.