Friday, September 13, 2013

Rumor Control

Hey guys, Beckley here.

So things have been pretty busy over the past week with my various duties.  I’ve noticed that people have been asking me a lot of questions recently.  I guess they are under the impression that I’m the guy with all the answers despite (or maybe because of) me not being on the Council.  So to break down all the recent news and provide answers to the most common questions I get, here are the facts:

1.: Where is Josh?
He hasn’t specifically said in his posts, so even if I knew, I wouldn’t say.  But I don’t know.  From the descriptions he’s given in his posts, though, I’d say he retired to Miami.

2.: Where are all the zombies coming from?
Yeah, it seems like, starting a few months ago, the undead really stepped it up.  Still, let’s keep in mind that this doesn’t even begin to compare to swarms we’ve dealt with in the past so panic is uncalled for.  The zombies are all pretty much exclusively New Breed, which makes people worry.  And those Old School Zombies (OSZs, as I will call them for convenience) that are outside the walls keep vanishing.  Josh has postulated that they’re being used as mobile food banks by the New Breed.  So I think that’s the answer to the original question.  The New Breed have eaten the easily caught animals and people out there.  Anyone and anything that’s left is adept at surviving.  The New Breed are hungry and that’s why they’ve seemed to be coming with a purpose recently, but not in the numbers we used to see.  Now whether this signifies the death throes of all zombiekind, or if it’s an end of the line that portends a new evolutionary leap for the zombification organism, I just don’t know.  Hopefully the former and not the latter.  Josh expressed his hope that maybe this violent flesh-eater zombie is being phased out by the organism, that it could become more beneficial.  Personally, I’ll settle for all zombies dying of hunger and letting our own evolution go from there.

Oh, and as a side note, there are currently about half a dozen OSZs outside the walls at various times.  So now is the time to place your bets which will be the last one standing before betting is closed.  Normally I wouldn’t sanction morbid gambling, but this is different.  People are recognizing that the OSZs, the things that started this whole apocalypse, are going extinct and this is their way of celebrating it.  I’ve put some Kool-Aid powder and Twinkies (very valuable because neither one goes bad, I don’t think) into the pot along with some other luxury items and my bet has been placed on the scrappy little OSZ in the nightgown.  The one with the doll tied to her arm.  I don’t want to know why she tied the doll to her arm because it would probably make me sad.  Thinking about child zombies used to do that to me, but I grew numb a while back.

3.: What about the UAS splinter groups?  Are they coming?
Yes they are and no you shouldn’t worry about it.  These guys have weapons, yes.  They have a drive to hurt us, yes.  But are they a credible threat?  No.  They’re not organized, they’re just a bunch of angry people with no means of organizing themselves.  They’ll come at us and they’ll probably each get gunned down, in turn, one hundred miles from the Haven gates.  These guys are not even on my threat radar, and from what I understand, they’re not on the Council’s either.

4.: I’ve heard the marauders are on the move.
Yeah, we’ve all heard those rumors.  This I do worry a bit more about.  Marauders have a history of surviving and they are ruthless.  And the ones that are still out there, who didn’t take amnesty, are some nasty, horrible people.  The dregs of the sociopath barrel.  And them being on the move makes sense.  It’s been over three years since The Fall.  I’m sure the different groups have eaten up and used every resource at their disposal.  The time has come for them to move on to the next town, city, or survivor settlement.  I’ve mentioned before that I hate marauders.  I really don’t want to deal with them again, but I fear it’s inevitable.

5.: Seriously though, where’s Josh?
Go away.  Really, go.  I have work to do.

No comments:

Post a Comment